Perspective

Even after so many years I realize that I'm fundamentally still the same person deep down inside, albeit changes physically. I've spent so long being critical and bitter at the world that I've seem to forgotten that the only person that should matter is me. That the only person that can change how I view the world is myself. And right now perhaps I hope that it's not too late to change all that.
It always take reading it from another's perspective to wake me up to random facts that I should have known all along. But point is, there'll always something to be critical about, always something to hate on, something to be blamed on. And I've done all that.
But I feel like it's perhaps better for me to concentrate more on myself now. Despite already being self-centered perhaps I need to be more self-aware. That if I can see myself for how I am, then it's not important if others see me differently. That if I can learn to love myself, then others can start to love me. I think I've been stuck in the same perspective for years despite constantly talking about how I'm gonna live life fresh here and there, I've actually been running in circles this whole time. I need to learn how to look at myself from my own perspective and stop basing myself on how I want people to view me. It's not going to be easy when I've been doing the opposite my whole life but somehow somewhere I've got to start trying, again.
I'm always going to be hated by someone, always going to be looked down on by some people, yet now I need to focus everything I have to people who love me. I have and I know who they are, and I'm comforted.



Stop there and let me correct it
I wanna live a life from a new perspective
You come along because I love your face
And I'll admire your expensive taste and,
who cares divine intervention
I wanna be praised from a new perspective,
But leaving now would be a good idea
So catch me up I'm getting out of here
- New Perspective, Panic at the Disco


Perhaps I'll grow fat because I stop controlling myself.
Oh wait I'm already fat.
Haha.


xxx,
Mrs Micky